Hare Krishna Prabhujis and Matajis,
Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and Srila Gurudeva.
This is in continuation of the transcription of one of the necatrean, powerful, thought provoking Bhagavatam class given by our beloved spiritual master, H H Mahavishnu Goswami Maharaj in Alachua. Let us continue to hear another instructive answer given by Maharaj for marital problems.
Maharaj: In no way you should try to change your marital relationships and definitely not after children. After you have children, please forget about separation or divorce. This is really obnoxious and you destroy the community by such practice. We must be satisfied and happy in our own conditions. With all care and everything, we may come across the irreparable situations in marital relationships. That is also a possibility, because there are so many attractions. We are in the ocean of Kaliyuga. There are so many factors that are attracting. But suppose if you are unable to continue with the relationship, you just remain satisfied once it is gone and you must not repeat it. And if you don't repeat and if you have children, atleast they can look up to one mother or father, who is not married again. Those children are in the most difficult situation. They go to father. They have demoniac step-mother. They go to the mother, they have demoniac step-father. They cannot relate. I have seen, one mother who had a small child, just 3 years old. She was separated and married to some other person. Child could not get adjusted to that father. The mother was sitting in the temple and the child wanted some ice-cream or something. The mother asked the child to go and ask the father. The child sat there and didn't go at all. Because he didn't know. He thought that father is absent and this mother is mad now to ask me to go to someone else. He couldn't relate to that man. This is how children have real irreparable loss. Their brain is damaged because of the lack of affection.
These things we have to understand and we have to tolerate. Unless we are tolerating we cannot go anywhere in this world. Everywhere we are tolerating. Or it is better that if you cannot continue, if you cannot get married and you can pull on, then you have to marry anyway. You marry a woman or marry the scriptures. You have to decide what you want to do. But once you marry, you have to be honest in that and that honesty has got to have the continuous flow of lakshmi. Otherwise that is the main cause of separation and as I told you that even if you work very hard, there is a chance that you may not get anything. But then, both of you know that you are trying very hard honestly. But at the moment, Krishna does not wish. So we pull on somehow or the other. So devotees should not worry. That is the my point. If you come to Krishna, then Krishna will definitely maintain and give you some humble place to stay. Try to manage on your own and you will find some way. In material world also we try this or that and everywhere paraabhavat taavad abodha jaato. We are defeated.
paraabhavas taavad abodha jaato
yaavan na jijnaasata aatma tattvam
yaavat kriyaas taavad idam mano vai
karmaatmakam yena shareera bandhah
"As long as one does not inquire about the spiritual values of life, one is defeated and subjected to miseries arising from ignorance. Be it sinful or pious, karma has its resultant actions. If a person is engaged in any kind of karma, his mind is called karmaatmaka, colored with fruitive activity. As long as the mind is impure, consciousness is unclear, and as long as one is absorbed in fruitive activity, he has to accept a material body." (SB 5.5.5)
Unless you try very seriously for self-realisation, all your activities are bound to be defeated. And always this entangles us into another body, again another body. This karma drags us to the bodies, unless it is Krishna conscious karma or karma yoga. It is very easy to tell these things. But to put into practise, it is like the story of the sadhu and his goat (laughter). But there is no other way. No other way.
Krishna willing we shall continue to hear more nectar from Maharaj in the subsequent offerings.
Thank you very much.
Yours in service of Srila Prabhupada and Srila Gurudeva,
Sudarshana devi dasi.
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