How to Deal with Dilemmas?

How to Deal with Dilemmas?

18th Mar 2011
Sudarshana devi dasi

Hare Krishna Prabhujis and Matajis,
Please accept our humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and Srila Gurudeva.

Below is a humble effort to transcribe one of the nectarean thought-provoking classes given by our beloved spiritual master H H Mahavishnu Goswami Maharaj on Bhagavad Gita verse 15.5 in Sri Sri Radha Neel Madhav Dham, Rajkot on 23rd December 2006.

nirmāna-mohā jita-saṅga-doṣā
adhyātma-nityā vinivṛtta-kāmāḥ
dvandvair vimuktāḥ sukha-duḥkha-saṁjñair
gacchanty amūḍhāḥ padam avyayaṁ tat

Those who are free from false prestige, illusion and false association, who understand the eternal, who are done with material lust, who are freed from the dualities of happiness and distress, and who, unbewildered, know how to surrender unto the Supreme Person attain to that eternal kingdom.

Dvandvair means dualities. In our life, there are always dilemmas - whether to do this or do that. One or the other way, these dilemmas always puts us into troubles. So what to do? What should we do? We should never dwell in duality. If you are in duality, then you are wasting your time. Either do this or that. So duality has to be sorted out. Take for example if you are having a duality of whether to get married or not. Then what happens is that, by meditating on that point, we neither do the service nor are we marrying. This is the result. So duality should be avoided. If we can, decide one thing - either to stay in the temple or to get married. Even if you are not able to decide, at least get rid of the duality. Think that, "Krishna will sort the duality and until then I must do my duties." Intensify your sadhana very seriously and this is the way to avoid duality. We should not be victimised by the trick of Maya. There is a trick of Maya to present the dualities in front of you. Because we don't have faith in Krishna that He is in control, that is why we are in duality. So never please give in to duality.

Try to sort out if you can. If you cannot sort out, then intensify your sadhana and eventually He will sort it out anyway. If Krishna wants you to marry, you will get married. If He doesn't want you to get married, then He will keep you as it is. So leave it to Krishna. You will not be able to sort out. This is the way to get out of dualities. In this whole world, people don't understand how to get out of these dualities. They always unknowingly dwell in duality and they cannot do anything and their whole time is wasted. So please whatever seva is in your hands, whatever seva you are doing, do it very immaculately well and eventually, the things will be taken care of. This is how the duality must be stopped. "dvandvair vimuktaah sukha-duhkha-samjnair" - How to be removed from these dualities? "gacchanty amudhaah padam avyayam tat" - It is not possible. amudhaah means those who are not foolish, they attain the eternal abode - But this is not possible if one is not liberated from dualities - dvandvair vimuktaah. This is the point. The same principle is magnified in Bhagavad Gita and Bhagavatam.

In Bhagavad Gita, we know that Arjuna had a duality, whether to fight or not. Eventually, he threw the bows and arrows and sat down, putting the hand on his head as if he is the doer. And that's what Krishna explains to him that, "You are not the doer. I am doing everything." And this is the answer for all dualities. Everywhere you see the same principle is there. Duryodhana thought that he is doing. Dhritarashtra thought that he is doing. Yudhishtira thought that Krishna is doing everything and he was liberated of dualities. You see the difference. Duryodhana was completely consumed by his enviousness and he was always in duality. Karna was giving him support in duality and Karna was destroyed. Shakuni supported him in duality. He was also destroyed. Same with Bhishma and Drona. So we see even big big personalities are destroyed because of dualities. Then what are we really? To our best capacity, we try to sort out. But if we cannot sort out, please continue with whatever seva you are doing. The place where you are staying is known to you. In case of jobs also it is the same thing. Same with business etc. Everywhere when faith in Krishna is absent we are consumed by worries. Those who have strong faith in Krishna, they are not worried. They don't worry about the past or future. But they are very particular about the present. This is the way to get out of the dualities. Please try these points and sort out your situations, to the best of your ability and if you are not able to sort out, leave it to Krishna - As it is, He is doing it.

In marriages, it is a big problem, because two parties are involved. One party might want it. But unless Krishna is merciful, the another party will never be favourable. When Krishna decides that this pair is alright, then He inspires the other party to be favourable to you. Till that time you have to wait and this waiting period is a dangerous waste of time because you keep meditating on it. Meditating on any subject other than Krishna is a mere waste of time. This has to be remembered. This is one of the practical points we can understand from this verse. Jai Srila Prabhupada ki Jai!

Thank you very much.
Yours in service of Srila Prabhupada and Srila Gurudeva,
Kalacakra Krsna das and Sudarshana devi dasi.